O come let us adore Him
It was about a year ago,
Galen and I were in a time of transition. Ever since we had dated all the way
back in high school we had always shared a desire to foster and/or mentor young
kids. We found ourselves at a crossroads
last year and a real stirring in our spirits that it was time to start asking
the questions and pursuing what we felt God was laying on our hearts to
do. Our church held a foster/adoption fair
and so we learned a lot and asked many questions. We even got the name of an agency and set up
a time to meet. From that point on, we
communicated frequently, asked the hard questions, met with other families that
had adopted and just really tried to seek what God was calling us to do. We have always liked the idea of fostering
and/adoption because it was a ministry our family could do together. It would require all of us to be on board, to
be in prayer, to give grace and to love this other person. But when we looked at what it would mean to
foster a baby, it just didn’t seem to fit our family’s strengths and present
situation. It was like we were trying to
make a puzzle piece fit that wasn’t the right match.
That dream quickly got
put on hold when last fall, at the same time we were trying to foster, we were
told by Galen’s wonderful oncologist that there were problems with his cancer
tests. Simply put, after years on this
medicine, the levels of cancer present in his blood hadn’t come down past
.1. It baffled us both when we were told
just how “serious” this situation was; Galen was feeling fine, nothing seemed
to change, but we had been looked squarely in the eyes and truthfully told for
“Galen’s long-term chance of survival, we need to make some big changes.” That’s a pretty hard phrase to reconcile I am
sure at any time, but especially as I looked at my 32-year-old husband. We felt sucker punched and like he had been
diagnosed yet again. It was at that
point we had to hold off on us pursuing any thoughts of adopting or fostering. It was just a few weeks later that we would
find out we were expecting our fourth baby and Galen’s numbers started to show
signs of a resistance to his medication. It felt like our joyful news was yet
again tempered by the reality of his impending mortality.
During this time, God
really called Galen out and they wrestled about his faith and the reality that
Galen’s cancer was really real with actual consequences. And Galen felt the
weight of that despairing news. The
months crept on, we traveled to appointments, sought second opinions, cried
bunches and prayed like crazy. We
finally felt the burden of when in early May he had test results coming back
that were incredibly discouraging, disheartening and the kind that left you off
balance and very confused.
But God met us every
step of the way. He didn’t spare us from
the stormy season, but faithfully walked us through it.
Again.
And it was in the
following months that God began to make it clear he was going to use this time
of trial for something else and for His glory.
While life was still
very stormy for us, we had decided to open up our home to my younger brother
who was finishing up college so that our home could be a place of
transition. We had him sign a contract
with the understanding we wanted him to be the best “mentally, physically,
spiritually, emotionally, academically and financially.”
We
gave him a list of what we expected and a list of what he could expect from
us. And over the next four months, we
all did life together. We lovingly
challenged him and I saw Galen really speak into his life as a man to encourage
him, but had come about because of his wrestling with his cancer diagnosis. Never have I been prouder of my husband as I
saw him pray with passion, fervor, and boldness FOR and WITH my brother. I saw a genuineness in my husband that had
really just been worked out months prior.
It’s as if we needed that lesson to be able to go through this time
.
Our kids embraced my
brother and extended the unconditional love only children can have towards
others. It was by far one of the hardest
tasks our family has ever done, but it was also so wonderfully fulfilling. God always met us where Galen and I came up
short, which was almost every day. My brother decided to give his life over to
Lord and really began speaking into his life. But I’ll let my brother tell you
what God taught Him, however, no doubt God taught Galen and I the importance of
depending on Him and realizing that it is God who changes hearts, we only have
to be willing, praying ambassadors. My brother has since moved to Arizona in
search of his own adventure and we are so proud and happy for him, but we sure
miss him!
It was towards the end
of the summer we got Galen’s latest test results back and it was that his
numbers were coming back into normal range and then two weeks later we welcomed
our fourth child and third son, Abram Jude into our family 5 weeks early.
What a summer and what a
year filled with every emotion. It felt
like the year had come full circle for our family.
So why do I share such a
personal letter with you all? Because a
year ago, we didn’t see what God was doing, but 365 days later, we believe we
saw God fulfilling our hearts desire to mentor and find a ministry we could do
as a family. This dream didn’t get
satisfied the way we imagined it by inviting my brother to stay with us; but
that’s the thing about God – given dreams, we have to be open to those visions
being contented other ways and trust the Lord as He leads. In the end, it is
what is most satisfying for us, even though refining, and what brings God the
most glory.
We saw Him bring us
through despair of Galen’s cancer, AGAIN, and remind us we have an eternal hope
that we can lean on when times get hard. Every doctor’s
appointment over the previous year with Galen was a chance for me to be
reminded through tears that this life on earth isn’t the best we have to
experience. And when I dwell on that, all
I can say is “praise the Lord!!!” But in
fact, we do have the hope of heaven yet to come. A place of no tears, suffering,
disappointment and hurts. He has used
this reality to guide us in our relationships. This Christmas letter couldn’t
contain all the ways He was so intimately wrapped in the details while
navigating through the bigger parts of our lives as well. So, while it was
quite the year, and by far one of our hardest in twelve years of marriage, I
wouldn’t rewrite one day of it.
And so, as this year and
even this chapter comes to a close, I tuck these last 365 days in the back of
my pocket for the next time we find ourselves at a crossroads knowing full well
God really can and will navigate us through any season as He always has been
true to do before. And I find myself quiet, still and full of thanks as I look
towards the season in which I can celebrate the birth of hope. We pray wherever
you find yourself in this Christmas season, that maybe this letter would
encourage you to trust the hope of Christ Jesus.
With love,
Galen, Kelli, Benaiah,
Boaz, Keziah + Abram Rasler
At one time we too were
foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and
pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and
love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but
because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by
the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been
justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal
life. Titus 3:3-7
P.S.
For those of you used to a more traditional letter, here are some quick
updates on our family:
Benaiah is 6 ½ years old and loving 1st
grade at Jefferson. He tried football
this year and can’t wait be active in it again. He is an outstanding big brother and loves all
things Super Mario Brothers. Boaz is 4 ½ years old and enjoying preschool. He is looking forward to kindergarten next
year, although, at this present time isn’t willing to admit it. He loves doing
whatever Benaiah is doing, but is especially enjoys building just like his
daddy. Keziah is our spunky newly turned
3-year-old. Currently, she is enjoying
activities like ballet and role playing at home as Belle from Beauty and the Beast. She isn’t your usual damsel in distress, as
she is happy to get her brothers toy guns to go take care of the stinky wolves
(Benaiah + Boaz) when the Beast (daddy) isn’t around to save her. Abram, our 3 ½ month old gift is doing
well since his two week stay in the NICU after coming 5 weeks prematurely. He is filling out well, gaining that double
chin and chubby thighs and starting to really look like he fits in our family!
